What's the point?

You might be asking yourself, hey, what's the point of blogging? And especially, starting a blog now? Even if this doesn't make it past a week, UM (Unsolicited Miscellany for short, which all the hipsters will no doubt be calling this blog soon, and you don't want to be left out, or wondering what the hipsters are referring to, and you certainly can't mark yourself as uncool (or as Stephen King would put it, Uncool) by asking said hipsters exactly what they're talking about, or you'll be ignored and dismissed in what will seem like an eternity, but will actually last 1/4 of a second. Then they'll go back to talking about their horn-rimmed glasses, socialist summer camps, and so many other things you weren't exposed to, and how is that your fault, but I digress) is indeed starting now. I mean, after all, lots of media gadflies and other assorted experts say that blogging has jumped the shark.

As an aside, notice the use of "lots" and "other" instead of specific examples; I can't be bothered with that type of research! Neither can you, I suspect. Now that I've addressed you, dear reader, in a familiar and positive way, you should now be disposed to view me positively, love my blog, tell all your friends about it, and make me rich and famous beyond my wildest dreams. I'm not really sure how that's going to work, but bear with me, this is a wildest dream we're talking about. Wildest dreams of course, not being known for their great sense of detail. Unless details of said dream involve sexy hula dancers; I have a tremendous facility for remembering those details.

As another aside, has 'jumping the shark' 'jumped the shark?' I would say that it has, if for no other reason than it provides a terrific, entertaining meta moment, which is great, perhaps even better than music you haven't paid for.

Now back to why write a blog. I know what Edmund Hillary would say out of context: "Because it's there." There's no real compelling reason to write a blog that I can see, other than the following reasons:
1) You're massively egocentric and wish to regale the world with every thought you have about every trivial thing. And you like emo?
2) You're older than 25, just lurve the internet, and several high school principals have strongly suggested to the court that you not be allowed access to MySpace anymore. And you know who you are.
3) People actually care about what you have to say (Ha, kidding! Just making sure you're paying attention, good for you)
4) You alternatively love/hate the Bush administration.
5) You are bored bored bored and insist on taking others down with this quickly sinking ship.
6) You secretly desire fame/fortune. This would be me, but I outwardly desire this, placing me out of this column.
7) Last but not least, and my true motivation, reasons that will become apparent...
In the future!

What a terrific cop-out to finish the first post, see ya later!